Therapy

I just dropped Aaron off at therapy.  As we were driving there (it's about a 15 minute drive), he turned to me and said, "So today I found out that Sara was right, I can't draw very good."  We were stopped at a stop light, so I turned to look at him and said, "What did Sara tell you?"  He said, "She said it a long time ago, that I wasn't good at art.  And today I found out that she was right.  We had to draw something, and mine was terrible.  Everyone else's looked good, but mine was aweful."  He had tears welling up in his eyes, and I could tell that he wasn't just fishing for compliments, he was really upset about it. 

I sighed deeply, then tried to heal my little boy's feelings.  "Aaron, do you remember why you started going to therapy?"  He shook his head "no".  "It was a long time ago--two years ago.  You were in Kindergarten, and you couldn't hold a pencil to write.  But, we started going to therapy, and you worked really hard to be able to hold a pencil, and worked so hard at making your hand writing better, and now it's great."  He interrupted me, "I'm not talking about my handwriting, I'm talking about my drawing".  I said, "I know.  But, you know you had to work really really hard to learn to write and make it look good.  You've had to work harder than any of your other friends.  But you've done it.  Drawing is a lot like writing, and it probably is harder for you than everyone else.  But, just like writing, if you practice enough you will get better."

Sometimes I wish I could ease Aaron's burdens.  He has to work so hard on things, and it doesn't seem fair that it comes so easy for others.  I do know it is making him strong, and that's a good thing.  But at times, when he has a hard day, I wouldn't blame him for just throwing in the towel and saying "enough!".  Over Christmas he really struggled.  He needs stability.  This kitchen remodel has been really hard on him.  He doesn't like change.  At all.  And then not being in school, and having the craziness of Christmas, he really struggled.  We ended up doing two days of therapy (two hours each day) each week he was out during Christmas break, and I think it helped. 

Aaron is a tough kid.  I remember him being little (like 2 or 3), and being so frustrated that he was so incredibly strong willed.  I kept telling myself that it would be a good trait for him to have later in life.  And I can now see that it is that strong will that is enabling him to concur his SPD.  He has come so far and improved so much.  He will always struggle, but I hope that he came to our home because we were the best equipped to help him live a happy and full life.  But it's days like this that I find myself hoping that I'm doing enough.  I hope I am.